A Father's Love

After months of planning and preparation, the day had finally come for Becky’s surprise 40^th birthday party. Becky’s birthday is October 28 and her dad’s was the 29^th.  Since the time she was a teenager, they had always celebrated with Mexican food and a picture of them in sombreros.  This party, however, was all Pop’s idea. Several months prior, he had organized meetings, brainstormed, hired and met with a caterer (and even went out to lunch with him), secured a location, and combed through decades of pictures to create a 30 minute video tribute (which he poured dozens of hours into). He could not wait to bless his daughter. It was his joy to do so.

The image that will forever be etched in my mind, and one that evidently had an impact on me at the time, due to all of the pictures I have of just this one part of the event, was Pop looking out the window for Becky to arrive. He was like a kid in a candy store. Eager. Expectant. Overjoyed. He couldn’t wait for her to walk through the door and to have a night celebrating her. It had nothing to do with him…. He wanted to bless her, give her good gifts, and put her in the limelight, even though, really, he was behind it all. In fact, Becky wouldn’t be here today if it weren’t for her dad! Nor would she be the woman she is without the great influence he had on her life.

The night was fantastic. It went off without a hitch. Days later, Becky approached me and asked if I knew how much the catering cost, because she wanted to help pay for it. I remember telling her that her parents wouldn’t even consider it—that they loved her so much. It was as if nothing to them. Spare no expense. I want to bless my daughter, because… she’s my daughter.

There was so much in the planning process and actual event of this party that made me think about a father’s love, and ultimately the Father’s love toward His children. What a picture of this we had in Jack and Becky’s dad, and what a blessing that is. I think we often struggle to see God this way—especially when we mess up, or aren’t at our “best.” So, if a human father can show us just a small glimpse of the essence of God’s love, how much more does the perfect, all knowing, all mighty, Creator of our souls, full-of-love-God love us, view us, and want to bless us? 

He gave and continues to give to us.

He who did not spare his own Son, but gave him up for us all—how will he not also, along with him, graciously give us all things? Romans 8:32

And…

Every good and perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of the heavenly lights, who does not change like shifting shadows. James 1:17a

He can’t wait to be with us.

 “In My Father’s house are many mansions; if it were not so, I would have told you. I go to prepare a place for you.” John 14:2

He thinks about us.

How precious are your thoughts about me, O God. They cannot be numbered! I can’t even count them; they outnumber the grains of sand! Psalm 139:17

He saves us, delights in us, comforts us and rejoices over us.

The LORD your God is with you, he is mighty to save. He will take great delight in you, he will quiet you with his love, he will rejoice over you with singing. Zephaniah 3:17

So, we have a God who over and over again in His Word tells us how much he loves us. He is ultimately:

With us

For us

Our Creator (not a single other person in all of history is exactly like us—He purposefully designed us).

I have a feeling that God is in the party business. And the blessing business. And head of the joy department. And the crazy thing is that we don’t deserve it one bit. His love for us is deep, steadfast, and ultimately unconditional.

The first stanza of How Deep the Father’s Love for Us sums this up so well.

How deep the Father’s love for us

How vast beyond all measure

That He should give His only Son

To make a wretch His treasure

This side of Heaven, I am convinced we cannot come close to understanding God’s love for us. But, I am incredibly thankful for moments on earth that remind us of this fact as far as we can comprehend, especially when Satan is constantly trying to tell us otherwise.

I will never forget Becky’s dad standing at that window, with a huge smile on his face, waiting eagerly for his daughter. It is a perfect image of a father’s love forever etched in my mind and on my heart.

Happy birthday Becky!  And happy first birthday in Heaven, Pop.

The Front Row

I attended a funeral today and sat in the back row. I was there to support my close friend in the loss of her father. It was less than three months ago that I was at a funeral, and that time I was sitting in the front row. It struck me today how that front row changes you. It changed my perspective as I sat in the back and watched my friend in the front, knowing all too well what the next days and weeks might be like for her. I pondered how we will all be in the front row too many times in our life, we will all be in the back multiple times, and one time, we will be the one in front of the front row for whom all are there to grieve and celebrate. It seems we will experience each position in that room.

While the loss of a loved one is perhaps the deepest grief we will ever experience, there is something beautiful that God does in this process. I remember sitting in that front row so recently. The day was surreal, but one vivid memory was knowing that rows and rows of people were sitting behind us, literally and figuratively. I remember feeling sorrow like I had never felt before, but love like I had never felt before, all at the same time. It was confusing and comforting. The people in those rows behind us took time off of work to show they cared, they sent cards, they sent meals, they visited, they traveled, they called… they put aside something normal in their life in order to get behind someone experiencing something that should not be normal. And while I know their motivation was compassion, concern, and care for our family, I wonder how many of them have been changed by being in that front row. Is that why some people grab your arm and look you in the eye in a way that says, “I know”? They hate what you are going through, and they show up to sit behind you, because that’s God’s beautiful design for relationships. It’s His loving kindness for people you can see and touch and talk with to be a balm for hard days. One friend who has been in the front row as well, visited shortly after my father in law passed away and said, “It was good to lay eyeballs on you.” I knew what she meant when I saw my friend just after her father passed this week. It was good to lay eyeballs on her and to hug her with the tightest and longest hug I’ve ever given her and to just be there.

While I didn’t like being in the front row at a funeral, I think there is great importance in it. The front row teaches you much about God’s love and goodness. It reminds you of all the people He has put in your life who love you dearly and who are behind you. And it teaches you why it is so important to sit behind those who are in the front row when it is their turn to endure that hard position. For those who have never been in the front row, being in the back teaches you that when you are in that front row someday, God will sustain you. You’ll know that the people He has put in your life will show up and be behind you that day and during that hard time. And you’ll gain hope that you will make it through someday when you do have to sit in the front row.

Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of compassion and the God of all comfort, ⁴ who comforts us in all our troubles, so that we can comfort those in any trouble with the comfort we ourselves receive from God.” 2 Corinthians 1:3-4

Rejoice with those who rejoice, weep with those who weep. Romans 12:15